Being Called Names Hurts?

People are differentA few weeks ago, someone blasted one of my posts as hateful. I guess if you are thin-skinned, people who throw word rocks can really affect you. Are you thin-skinned?

What Does Thin-Skinned Mean?

You know, don’t you? It’s being oversensitive, especially to criticism or insult. That’s the dictionary definition. Those salvos people write and mock hurt, don’t they?

It hurt me. I couldn’t sleep thinking about it. I eyed my text slowly over and over. I couldn’t see why someone would say I was being hateful. I asked questions. I didn’t use bad words, profanity or negative attacks like hostage, terrorist, hater. I thought I was simply stating facts.

Come to find out that some people don’t like it when you say something different from what they think they know. Ouch! Was that an insult?

Well, face the truth. Facts and opinion are different. Some just don’t want to face facts. Some people cling to their opinion as if it was the facts.

Some people believe the way they believe, and if you disagree, you are the hater and all the other nasty descriptive negatives that mudslingers dish out. It does hurt. Don’t deny it.


I wondered why people are so stubborn. Why do men and woman of all ages act like a child who wants what he wants and that’s all there is to it. Why can’t we Americans stop, pause, count to ten. Consider for a moment that maybe just maybe there is some part of a differing opinion where we can find common ground?

Duck Dynasty Phil

Look what happened to Phil. He spoke his opinion, his belief, and was punished for it. Why is it any of our business? Why do we think we have the right to chastise him for his beliefs? What gives us the right?

Well, I’m going to take a wild guess. Maybe America has turned into an intolerant hemisphere of backlash bigotry and crusaders — that means any vigorous, aggressive movement for the advancement of an idea or cause. “It’s my way or the highway, ye braggats.”

I admit or at least it’s my belief that those who wear an intolerant hat are the few — not the many. But their sharp spun rhetoric hurts just the same, doesn’t it?

My Father’s Advice

My father was a kind man. Never a mean word to anyone or about anyone. He wasn’t a bully.

Growing up, my father told me to be respectful to others even when I don’t agree. He said, “Little girl, when you grow up there are going to be people who don’t like you because you’re Mexican.” I didn’t know what he was talking about.

At that age, I was not street smart. He went on to say, “You remember who you are before you shout back. You are a good person. You are a good daughter. Don’t let anybody turn you into someone I can’t be proud of.”

Wow! I paraphrase, but as an adult I thought understood what he was teaching me. But it just dawned on me what he meant.

Americans Wear Different Hats

When you look at the people you live with in this great country and have religious and cultural differences, it’s like friends and neighbors wear different hats. We are different from one another. We look different, believe different, live different — but we are Americans.

We are a people who fought bloody wars so we could be different — without retribution or criticism.  A few Americans have forgotten the price paid for us to be able to be different and still respect each other.  Those who exercise their free speech to harm others is not what America is about. I’m not a hippie, but I believe America is love — not hate. Peace, not war. United, not divided.

It’s healthy to have different opinions, but when you use your opinion as a weapon to harm another, it’s wrong. When you point slings and arrows at another for stating his beliefs, you are in the wrong. You don’t have to be a Christian to know it. It’s just common sense.

The simple truth is that you can’t promote your belief by criticizing someone else’s belief. It’s Un-American. It’s a slap in the face of those who died to give us our freedom.

America is No Insult Zone

I’m not saying you have to agree with Duck Dynasty Phil Robertson, but you should respect him. He didn’t point at you, say your name. He listed groups, but who is so thin-skinned? If you belong to one of these groups, you don’t have to like it, but you should respect his opinion?

Why let what one man believes hurt you? Lash back and you reinforce his belief. He has his belief. You have yours. Good Americans respect each other. That’s what makes us great.

When individuals and business, too, punish a person for personal beliefs, where does it end? Who will tell the truth? Those few weeks ago, when I was lambasted for my personal beliefs and opinions, I felt bad. I was thin-skinned. I deleted that post. Now, I regret deleting it.

Being Grand is about food, family, and US politics. Join Being Grand, Follow me on Twitter at @AlexandriaMarx. Like this post on Facebook. Happy thoughts.

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Category: Tabletalk

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Alexandria Marx

About the Author

Grew up inside my dad's 3 Mexican restaurants. Raised 3 hungry kids. Homemaker. Hispanic. Conservative. WAHM.

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